Missing

A missing muse,

still I refuse

to turn away.

Deny, delay.

Hours pass,

regrets amass,

What's left to say?

Another day

of quiet curses,

lines, and verses.

I lost you in

the shake and spin,

the ups and downs,

the muffled sounds.

And all I ask,

if you're up for the task,

is you come say hi

when you're around.

***************************************

 

 

"So all that I ask is you come say hi when you're around. It ain't much, but it's good enough for me." Radical Face The Moon is Down

Every Breath

There's a light in the distance,

bright against the dark,

but I question its existence;

for it's such a tiny spark.

It is curious and blinding

and it will not fade away

and for all my never-minding,

there is something I should say.

I know I'm letting go

and I know you will forget

and I'm watching the light grow

as I'm filling with regret.

So, place your hands in mine

and I'll keep you nice and warm.

We are running out of time,

racing fast toward the storm.

I am safe in your heart beat,

despite this slow, impending death.

In the darkness, we will meet.

I loved you with every breath.

****************************************************

"I'm racing toward the one mistake that locks me in my place." Kevin Devine Just Stay

 

"Death dreams you don't forget. It's been a while since I dreamed this, but even now, when asleep, I'll tread with care." Frightened Rabbit Death Dream

Beacon

The shadows never hide you

as well as you would think

and your skies are never perfect blue,

but I'll never let you sink.

The rain might fall and wet your skin

and tangle up your hair,

but if you'd ever let me in,

I'd never not be there.

Turn on your light and sing your song,

my beacon 'cross the lake.

If everything we do is wrong,

it's still a bet I'll take.

Mars is in clear view tonight.

I trust you saw him too.

The moon picks up my pen to write

a ballad ever true.

******************************************************

 

 

 

"In the shadows, the name is unknown to me." Sunny Day Real Estate Shadows

"I'm sinking like a stone in the sea. I'm burning like a bridge for your body." Brand New Tautou

"And you know I was lost when I found you." Copeland Like a Lie

Stuck

You're my phantom limb,

a crime of passion.

I'm grey and grim,

erased, and ashen.

I wanted your smile.

I wanted your heart.

Our dreamy denial:

a sick work of art.

I'd still breathe you in

if you'd lay down beside me,

but the air here's too thin,

a low and lifeless plea. 

So, choked in my throat

is where you'll be stuck

like the words that I wrote

when your lightning struck

me down to my core

and burned me from my guts.

The spark shines no more,

just ashes of cigarette butts.

******************************************

"Yeah, we're only ashes." Something Corporate Only Ashes

"The impact, the aftershave, the European cigarettes, the taxi, the alcohol that lingers on your breath, the lipstick, the street lamp, the woolen overcoat, the front desk, you tell yourself: it isn't over yet..." Pedro the Lion Second Best

A Month

I haven't see the moon

in about a month.

I'm sure she's still up there;

I just haven't looked up.

I haven't seen a sunset

or smelled a blooming flower.

I've only sat and stared at dust

and counted lonely hours.

The pitying pendulum does swings

back and forth and back.

I let the air escape my lungs

'til everything turns black.

When I've seen my final dusk,

I'll dance among the stars,

but all I ever really want 

is to rest inside your arms.

*********************************************

"The moon was gone; from side the world was dark as nightmares..." Radical Face Bad Blood

Rewind

Never had I crossed a line

nor claimed to have a sturdy spine.

I misread every single sign

until our limbs had intertwined.

I closed my eyes and I was fine

and only knew your lips on mine.

The pills, the beer, the cheap red wine:

fatal mistakes made by design.

A song on repeat in my mind

you sang to me in almost-rhyme. 

Dancing atoms, now combined,

space and time left undefined,

I'm staying here - leave me behind -

I am a dream you can't rewind.

*********************************************************

"I'm drunk, I'm drunk and you're probably on pills. If we've both got the same diseases, it's irrelevant, girl." Frightened Rabbit Keep Yourself Warm

" I'm another day late and one year older. It's failure by design." Brand New Failure by Design

Night

The moon lost her pull

and the stars lost their shine.

Once, I was full

and the planets were in line,

but I'm floating off course,

now falling toward nothing.

I'm bloody and hoarse

from the silence, so crushing.

I asked for an answer,

begged for direction.

I once was your anchor,

your heartbeat, connection.

I searched for your light

through vacant vastness.

But your eternal night

has led me to madness.

*************************************************

"Am I here? Of course I am, yes. All I need is your hand to drag me out again. It wasn't me. I didn't dig this ditch. I was walking for weeks before I fell in." Frightened Rabbit The Loneliness and the Scream

"My wits begin to turn." King Lear Act III, Scene II.

Breaking

I lost my words

when I lost your tune.

Apologies unheard,

deemed inopportune. 

I turned down the volume.

I shut off the lights.

I fought through the sad gloom.

I searched every night:

a maze of false and true,

a path dark and violent.

But I never found you.

Your voice had gone silent.

Cold, naked, lost, alone,

I'm standing here shaking.

You're a statue of stone...

who I can feel breaking.

----------------------------------------------

"If I bend, then I might not break. I should think about giving in. If I bend, then I might be okay. I should think about how it ends." Frightened Rabbit Break

Fault Lines

The blues in my eyes

turn to black.

My chapped lipped lies

hit me right back.

I can't shake the picture

you painted by mistake

and no amount of liquor

can numb away the ache.

A fault line in my chest

that was always almost breaking

and a love never confessed

so my voice was always faking

made a mess of my insides

and a hell of my weak heart.

So I'll slip under your tides

while we breathe so far apart.

******************************************

"I know you're still dealing with her leaving. It's a shame, but you've only yourself to blame." Owen Nobody's Nothing

Sense

I dreamed I watched you

as you slept,

a mirage so true,

impression kept.

I saw your chest 

swell and condense.

We know we're blessed;

we have that sense.

I listened as your heart

beat out my name

like I am a part

of fiber and vein;

I brushed my fingers

along your body:

goosebumps linger,

but dreams are foggy.

And, oh, how my chapped lips

so begged to be wet,

to meet hands, thighs, and hips,

to know the taste of sweat.

If you'd only turn to me,

open those ocean eyes,

we'd melt as primal synergy

as one among the skies.

************************************************

"I feel an urgent need to apologize. I did a terrible thing in a terrible dream And now I can't look you in the eyes." Kevin Devine People are So Fickle

"'Cause your cracked, dry lips leave traces and more. I wake up wanting you. I wake up wanting you." The Unwinding Hours Traces